Breaking the habit

I was walking home from work and working out today (I smell of food and sweat, lovely) when I heard a "Hey." I looked up, and my old friend and one time romantic interest was sitting in his car. I haven't seen him since August. He told me he was getting into lots of trouble, had stopped drinking today, and that he'd spent last night in his car at a park because he didn't have any place to go. When I had last seen him, he had a motorcycle, a job, a room in a nice condo, and ambitions to start his own scuba diving shop. He had also been sober for a year and a half, the longest he had gone without drinking.
I wonder what happened, why he threw it away. I wonder if he even knows. And I wonder why some people can keep fighting their addiction while others succumb to it.
I used to think I could control a loved ones issues. If I prayed hard enough, tried the right tactic, was perfect myself, gave them everything, or punished them by withholding love, they would see what their behavior was doing to them, to me, to us, and they would quit. Now I know it's just not true. People change when they are ready to and not a moment before.
I told him about my cat and my trip to Ireland. Walking away, I realized that my life is good because I haven't given up on my dreams, even if it takes me a while to work up the courage to go after them. I felt grown up and happy that I have been able to love myself enough to give myself the gift of freedom. And I hope my friend finds the strength to give himself that gift too.
May you experience the joy of letting go of everything that holds you back from the greatness you were designed for. All my love.❤